Obviously, I know that I've mentioned we relocated our family from Fort Worth to Houston, but I haven't really mentioned it other than in a "it's happening" or "it happened" way. Different little tidbits have been dropped in different posts, but I thought it would be nice for our family history to discuss how this all happened. Plus we've already had to remind ourselves that Houston is where we are supposed to be.
Our Houston story really starts almost four years ago. During the Fall of 2009, Curt had some major problems at work. Without dwelling on it, it is enough to say that Curt was never happy after that point at his job. He was unemployed for two months at the end of 2009, but ultimately went back to his job to support our family. We just learned how to deal with the 48 percent pay cut he'd been given and tried very hard to move on. As time passed, things did get better. We saw so many blessings in our lives. The Lord very much took care of us and we were so glad that we had worked so hard to get a decent amount of our debt paid off while I was working for the almost first year of our marriage. Supporting our family for the next 3.5 years was really tough though. Especially with the addition of two babies. My parents helped a ton, buying 98% of all of the girls' clothes, plus some for even Curt and me. They helped some with groceries here and there, let us live with them twice, bought 75% of their diapers after we were tired of cloth diapers. Curt's parent's helped us with food so we wouldn't need to go on food stamps. They were very tight years that we wouldn't have survived without our parent's help, the Lord's blessing of tithing and Curt's "second job" i.e. college and his student loans and grants. For all these reasons, Curt never stopped looking for a job after going back to work in January of 2010. For over three years, he applied to jobs using his experience. He only applied to local jobs since he was attending school and didn't want to transfer. All in all...this was a stepping stone on the path to Houston...even almost four years ago.
In the Spring of 2012, the year lease on our apartment was up. One of the reasons we've never renewed a lease on an apartment we've rented is we get sick of the complex, the apartment itself and the rent is always raised. We were bursting at the seams in our two bedroom apartment and the rent jumped something like $125 for us to transfer to a 3 bedroom apartment in our complex. Emery and Ella were on the verge of being 18 months, which qualified them as official occupants. In the state of Texas, occupancy laws only allow two people to a bedroom, so we had to lease a three bedroom if we were to rent. Common rental procedure also requires the renters to prove that they make 3 times rent to get approved to live in their complex or house. With being forced into a higher rent and having to prove we made 3 times that rent, there was no way we could qualify for a three bedroom, but legally we couldn't rent a two bedroom. Honestly, the year before we couldn't prove we made 3 times the rent for the two bedroom but the rental company used a percentage of our tax return sitting in our savings account to get us qualified. Anyways, this forced us to start looking for a house. We couldn't find one in time to not be homeless, but amazing friends of our took us in. As hard as we tried to buy a house in our (at the time) current ward that we had been in for 3.5 years, it just didn't work out. The houses were too expensive except in one area and those were much older homes. We did put an offer on one, but we didn't get it (randomly a couple that we knew in the Singles' Ward outbid us).
Obviously we did get a house, but it wasn't in our ward, sadly. This whole story is very significant to our family history and to our pathway to Houston story. The first reason or stepping stone is us moving out of a ward that we loved. All of us loved. Curt enjoyed it (especially since his brother had moved in a few months previous too) and had friends there. I had super amazing best friends there. Isabelle loved her nursery class and classmates. Her best friends were the kids of my best friends and it worked out perfectly. Ella and Emery, while young, loved that Grammie and Papa where there to help with them and they did attend nursery a few times and loved it in there too. Then we moved to a ward that...well...we very much disliked. The point is that when it came time for us to realize Houston was in our future, a mere 9 months after we bought our house, I have to admit, leaving the new ward was a big plus for me. It would have been so much harder to decide to move to Houston if we had stayed in our previous, loved ward. Yes, I did manage to leave it before, but I could return for activities, craft nights, church meetings, etc because we had stayed local. It would have been very different. Plus, I learned things about myself, a ward member and a church member that I probably wouldn't have learned elsewhere, and definitely not by staying in our previous ward. The Lord knows what I need and what I need to learn and this ward was something I needed.
The second reason our house was significant was well...we worked for it, it became ours and then it worked for us. We learned so much renovating that house. Seriously. Looking back, I can't believe what we did to that house. Two people that had little DIY experience have turned into DIY pros. (Humble...I know. :D) In the end while we did invest a lot of money into our house, we made almost as much off the sale of it. That's counting all the tools that we took with us when we moved, the closing costs, the Realtor fees, everything. We did technically lose a little bit, but we have a bigger savings right now than we ever have had or would have had we not bought our house. This money bought us a new fridge for our rental house, the deposit and first month rent for our rental house, money to move down here, paid off bills and got our cars serviced. All of these things had to happen. There is no way we would have been able to afford any one of these things without the house money. So, while our house purchase in 2012 was a decision on our part made by lack of having anywhere else to live, it was so so so much more in the eternal perspective.
Back to Curt's work, for our next stepping stone... As time went on, most relationships healed at Curt's work. From January 2010 to early 2013, things remained the same at work. Fine but just fine. Sometimes things happened that hurt, but we tried hard to not let it bother us. Things were tough financially for us, but Curt's priority was school and the job was flexible enough for him to get his schooling done. In January of this year, Curt started what he thought was his last semester of school. This meant he started changing how he looked for jobs. Things at work had started to stir again with his two brothers that worked there and warning bells were constantly going off for us. We were stressed and full of anxiety worrying about things spinning out of control and turning into a bad situation like they had been in 2009 all over again. In the end though Curt found one of his brothers a different job. As much as we were happy for Luke, it was very very very bittersweet. We had always assumed Curt would be the next person to leave the company...and when it wasn't, it was pretty depressing for us. It gave Curt new determination to find a new job though. Especially since at this point I was pregnant, had no insurance and the thoughts of adding yet another member of our family to one that can't even afford to buy diapers and clothes and food for the current children really had us worried. We were definitely anxious to have Curt find another job.
Soon after finding his brother a job, Curt found a job in Houston he could apply to. He didn't apply at first because it was Houston, but after some encouragement, he submitted his application. He was contacted within days, had an interview set up for a few days later and offered the job the day after his interview.
Another huge stepping stone for us (ummm...mostly me) was during the time that Curt had the interview set up but hadn't interviewed yet. Curt's sister wrote me a page and a half letter detailing everything wrong with me and how much she hates me and disapproves of me as Curt's wife. In one of the most hurtful and embarrassing moments ever, we decided we were more than ready to move away from our current situation. It was time for a break. After this event I changed from, just take the interview and we'll talk about it after to take the interview and if they offer you the job, immediately accept it. It was time to leave...
Curt was perfectly qualified for the job in Houston. As soon as he applied, I knew he would get it. At the interview, Curt found out they were looking to hire more than one person...and as soon as we heard that, we knew it was in the bag. The day following the interview (March 7th), he was offered the job, at the top of the advertised pay range, and he immediately took it.
It was just the beginning of a very long transition. In review...
Late January/Early February: Found out we were expecting a baby
February: Curt found his brother a job
March 1: Received a hate letter
March 6: Curt's interview in Houston
March 7: Accepted the job as soon as it was offered
To make a long post, not too much longer, the next few months were long and hard. I'm not quite sure why things didn't work out easier. I had my miscarriage on March 23rd, the night following Curt's last day at work... Curt started his job on April 8th, he commuted for tests for five weeks... I worked on selling the house and keeping it perfect for showings, living as a single mom during the weeks while Curt stayed with his grandparents in Houston during the weeks, coming home each weekend... I was constantly going to doctor appointments and even back in the hospital... Our house finally sold on May 24th, 6.5 weeks after we put it on the market... We experienced lots of back and forth with the sell and it was super frustrating and we ended up feeling quite a bit jipped by a Realtor that lied and seemed to not care at all... Lots of problems finding a house to buy and then deciding to rent and that wasn't easy either... Ugh...even thinking about this is hard. It was just a really hard time, that no matter what I say or explain, it will never convey the loneliness, heart ache and emotions our family went through from March to July when we moved.
So many things have happened to us over the past 5.5 years. I look at our wedding pictures and I think about how young and inexperienced we were. Now I look at this picture we took February 2, after finding out I was pregnant, and I barely even know who we are here. Our life was as normal as it got for us. It feels so long ago. Our life is very different now. I look at this picture and it makes me sad...and jealous...and relieved. It's almost like I'm looking at different people.
Now our life is lonely in a different way, but full of happiness to be back together as a family. When we arrived here, we unpacked the essentials, decorated some and just relaxed. We enjoyed the family time and got used to being a family again. It took about a week and a half of living together before the girls weren't surprised to see Daddy at the end of the work day. They still don't quite understand why we can't go to Grandma's or Grammie's or friends' houses whenever they ask...although after two long trips, they do understand it is a very long drive to get there.
Our life here is different and we don't know what the Lord has in store for us here or why we felt so strongly that Houston is where we are supposed to be. Realistically, Houston is probably just another stepping stone. For right now though, it's home. We may rent and not own, we may not have any family or friends, we may be four hours away from what we consider our hometowns, but we are here together. It makes all the difference. We've already moved on to our next big hurdle/trial/hard things in Houston, but with Curt by my side every evening, we can handle it.
We took this picture the weekend we moved here to Houston. While we technically look like the same people as in the picture above...I know this couple a lot better than the couple in that picture. We have a lot more bruises and scars that you can't see with your eyes, but our sharp edges are a little smoother and (hopefully) we are stronger. Time moves on. While that's sad, on one hand...on the other, I'm very grateful for it.
